Best Spitzer-Related Comment yet

RE: A Needle in a Ho-stack

It seems that ABC news’ hooker hunt is more thorough than I previously imagined. After searching diligently, they’ve done the public a great service with this news report:

Escort: ‘I’m Not THAT Kristen’

A voluptuous brunette escort named Kristen, who advertises her availability online “for discriminating gentlemen,” says she is not the “Kristen” linked to New York Gov. Eliot Spitzer.

The online ad for Kristen, featuring provocative semi-nude lingerie photos, includes an update, “I am not the person the Daily News has mentioned in relation to the Spitzer case.”

The report does nothing to identify the other Kristen, but breathlessly confirming that another high class escort is also named Kristen certainly advances the the story, no? In order to help ABC news out, if you’re reading this and your name happens to Kristen, please IMMEDIATELY contact ABC news at the address below and inform them that you are a) not a prostitute or b) not the prostitute in question:

ABC News
7 West 66th Street
New York, NY 10023

UPDATE from a reader:

Awesome.She’ll now have a blurb for her web site:

“Voluptuous” – ABC News.

How many hookers get to post THAT?

That would be hilarious.

Advantages of being a Guy

I was talking to a friend last night and we got on to the topic of the advantages of being a guy. We both agreed that we much prefer being male, given what women have to go through: childbirth and monthly cycles being high on the list.

That’s not to say being a guy doesn’t have it’s downsides, though. The ones we focused on last night were dating related: having to be the one to approach the girl, having to be the one to make the followup call for another date, and getting the timing right, since if you call too soon, you’re desperate, but if you take too long, she figures you’re not really interested. A female friend once remarked on the same topic, that while she thinks guys have it easier in general, that’s one guy-assigned responsibility she’s glad she doesn’t have to deal with and is more than glad to let us keep that.

Other than the pain that comes from sudden shots to the groinal region, this is definitely my least favorite thing about being a guy. Any suggestions on other guy annoyances?

Why I will always love Lenny Dykstra – Philly Sports & Minutiae: Don’t Read This, Just Give Me Your Money Instead

“The Dude” during an interview on his new investment practice:

Host Bernard Goldberg: “Is it true you once said you don’t read books because they might hurt your batting eye?”

Lenny Dykstra: “Yeah. You got to rest your eyes, man, plus it makes you think too much.”

Goldberg: “Reading?”

Dykstra: “Too confusing.”

Goldberg: “Reading?”

Dykstra: “Yeah, I still don’t like to read.”

Goldberg: “And I’m supposed to follow your investing advice?”

Dykstra: “Only if you like money.”